Expendable Christmas Toy
Is this what I am, or rather, what I am not?
For all I believed was real, but really, was I
nothing more than merely a mean to take
you through the
night?
Maybe it is just me. I believed all was real, but
am I disposable, as with a cheap toy, or am I
no more, after you used
your share, and utterly forgetting
our scintillations. For just a
moment of thrill, you patronise me
with a kiss, laced with nothing more than
verisimilar passion, demeaning me with a
night laced with nothing more than
affection counterfeit.
A night filled with lies, lies that I believed
all to be real, yet all I said to
you was nothing less than the truth.
I lost, for I was the first,
first to take it seriously, beyond my
will, for believing all was real.
Foolish as I am, for I would willingly
Repeat history, all but for
A night of lies I would willingly believe, for
No one is as foolish as I.
Denial! I wished that
All was real; that you would tell me
'Yes, I am true to you.'
- KT (2014)
